When someone says, “It was 20 years ago.” I think, “Ah yes, the 90s!” But then they tell me it was 2006 and I have to sit down for a bit.
— Douglas A. Boneparth (@dougboneparth) March 28, 2026
The best thing i heard today was a pregnant women arguing with her husband and she said, "I have two Brains and you have one".
— 𝒢𝒾𝓁𝒷ℯ𝓇𝓉 (@AbakpaJob) March 29, 2026
my dog is crying bc i put his bone in my tote bag and its like…………..the bone is going in the tote bag because we're going to the DOG BEACH you IDIOT. you don't know ANYTHING. you're about to have the BEST DAY
— buy MORE, PLEASE (out now) (@EmmaSpecter) March 29, 2026
Weirded out by homes with no pets. Like where is your creature
— Soleil (@soleiljolina) March 28, 2026
a woman accidentally said “fuck” in a grocery store after dropping her phone and a kid standing behind her repeated it instantly.
— Freyy (@Freyy_is) April 1, 2026
she turned around absolutely horrified ready to apologize and the mother was crying.
her son is nonverbal and 10 years old and just said his first…
my wife waiting for me to open up a video she sent me while we're in the same room pic.twitter.com/ZAXEOV9LGg
— Trophy Husband 🏆 (@Brian_onX) March 28, 2026
Les lunettes de soleil et le sourire, Tupac n'a jamais fait ca…. https://t.co/78DinTfigO
— ilies (@Iliess_OPP) April 2, 2026
Toujours pas invitée sur nos "grands" médias alors que l'ambassadeur d'Israël y a littéralement une tribune ouverte quasi quotidiennement. https://t.co/Nh714ayk8g
— Manouck (@Manouck44) April 2, 2026
Quand il apprend que des pauvres ne seront pas mis à la rue et que le nombre de sdf ne va peut-être pas trop augmenter, le sang de big sergent garcia ne fait qu'un tour, il devient tout rouge et tout furibard, et des potatoes sortent de son cul https://t.co/vvArUO7LV5
— 😼 (@Jo_Lestampille) April 2, 2026
Si elle a fait exprès de mettre du CBD et de la farine dans son sac pour faire chier les flics, je vais être obligé de reconnaître que c'est une masterclass https://t.co/bWmaglV3Nm
— Kev adams hate account (2e edition) (@diplodocteur) April 2, 2026
