Your lower back as soon as you turn 30 pic.twitter.com/JF0Pw8Nezu
— Kein Mensch Kein Tier (@KampfmitKette) August 21, 2026
When butterflies fall in love do they feel humans in their stomach?
— jason (@morecjjj) August 23, 2026
sometimes i wanna socialise but I don’t wanna talk, I just want to be around like a cat
— ً (@artfuIchaos) August 22, 2026
The idea of going to hell because I touched my pussy is hilarious
— tutufrommars👾💜 (@tutus_cool) August 21, 2026
“Fill name as appears in passport”
— Adedapo (@_aaadedapo) August 22, 2026
Me: opens my passport to confirm my name.
My 1yo loves to pause her cry and say “I’m crying” when no one is paying her any mind lmao
— Aunty Mariah (@ariibay) August 22, 2026
a little life tip I just invented is to wash your hands properly in between cooking with chilli and removing contact lenses
— Mike Healy (@mike_hasarms) August 22, 2026
I accidentally said “Let’s take this outside” instead of “Let’s take this offline” during a Teams meeting today. Now I’m pretty sure I have to fight everyone in the parking lot at 4pm.
— 𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 (@OrevaZSN) August 24, 2026
I will say "bless you" for up to three sneezes in a ten-minute period. Any sneezes beyond that will go unblessed and you can go to hell
— Melvin of York (@MelvinofYork) August 21, 2026
Where can I find those families that say, "Take this $2m and stay away from our son " ?😔
— Lisa (@lisathebeauty1) August 24, 2026
