"why would i lie to you" idk maybe bc ur a man
— jynx (@jynxbby) June 14, 2025
i have an uncle who responds to text messages after two months, no one knows where he lives exactly & he shows up when he wants to.
— 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐬𝐞.☯ (@gontsematli_) June 11, 2025
he's one of my role models.😭
Finally asked my husband if I could throw away the fake plant that’s been on the kitchen windowsill for *three years* that I assumed he had some kind of emotional attachment to and he said “that’s a fake plant??”
— Czarina (@fishontherun2) June 9, 2025
At coffee shop. A man sat on me. He didn’t see me. He sat on me. I’m sat on. How can this happen
— juicy (@juicylifeforce) June 16, 2025
instead of texting “on my way” i’m just gonna start sending this pic.twitter.com/GGQlSq3fdN
— poppa (@popitforpoppa) June 15, 2025
Meanwhile human babies just decide randomly to turn blue and refuse to breathe just because it’s Thursday. https://t.co/NWIOxZj0R8
— Grip Skylark 💕✨ (@talleyberrybaby) June 12, 2025
just found out horses have menstrual cycles. imagine pms’ing and you’re also a fucking horse
— kj 🐅 (@kjaypaw) June 12, 2025
Im glad the makers removed all the unnecessary sex scenes from my life so I can focus on character development
— Demon Realms (@Demon_Realms) June 15, 2025
Hearing "I'll handle it" and then it's handled. https://t.co/UWdG2MVJXw
— Zoya🕊️ (@Zoya_ki_batein) June 13, 2025
told my roommate we were leaving at 1 and he got in the shower at 12:54 pic.twitter.com/vbwE2b0lKY
— itsy bitsy spider (@stxvxn_8381) June 14, 2025
