Men really like legacy and really like seeing little mini versions of themselves. Two of my sons look like my clones.
— Latinx Adjacent Doctor PhD (@TonerousHyus) August 20, 2025
It’s not lack of desire for more little clones lol
The problem isn’t that men want more children but that too many men want them without restructuring their own lives to carry the burden of parenthood. If men matched their desire with an equal willingness to parent like taking the night shifts, booking the appointments, https://t.co/xiI1kJcW0Y
— Martha Ahumuza (@MarthaAhumuza) August 21, 2025
shouldering the career sacrifices then women would be more open to the idea. Until then,women are simply refusing to be the ones who pay the highest price for someone else’s dream. That’s not selfishness but wisdom hard earned through centuries of women being told that family is
— Martha Ahumuza (@MarthaAhumuza) August 21, 2025
everything only to find out that "everything" really meant everything is theirs to do. Women are increasingly unwilling to subsidize men’s dreams with their own exhaustion. They are making rational decisions about their capacity and saying no not because they don’t love children
— Martha Ahumuza (@MarthaAhumuza) August 21, 2025
but because they know love alone doesn’t neutralize burnout, stalled careers,unaffordable childcare or the silent erosion of identity that comes when one partner carries the bigger share of parenting. So when men say they want more children women hear something different like,
— Martha Ahumuza (@MarthaAhumuza) August 21, 2025
I want the idea of more children but I haven’t accounted for who will actually raise them. It’s similar to someone who dreams of a puppy without calculating who will walk it or clean the accidents on the rug. Women have woken up to a truth previous generations often swallowed
— Martha Ahumuza (@MarthaAhumuza) August 21, 2025
that parenting is not a 50/50 partnership even when both partners believe it will be. Study after study confirms that even in dual earner households women shoulder more childcare and more domestic work. This isn’t a matter of personal choice but even the cultural infrastructure.
— Martha Ahumuza (@MarthaAhumuza) August 21, 2025
School calls,they call mom. Sick child? Mom rearranges work. Default parent is not a title women choose but one society bestows and most men even good men unconsciously accept it. For many men,children exist at the level of "want" the dream of legacy and continuity. For women
— Martha Ahumuza (@MarthaAhumuza) August 21, 2025
children exist at the level of work,midnight feeds, pediatric visits,unpaid career breaks etc. That asymmetry is what drives the gap. When men show consistentl that they want to parent as much as they want to procreate then women’s preferences will shift.
— Martha Ahumuza (@MarthaAhumuza) August 21, 2025
Until then,many women are making a rational decision of choosing the family size that doesn’t choose them last.
— Martha Ahumuza (@MarthaAhumuza) August 21, 2025
