I asked the guys at my favorite Mexican restaurant if they’re making fun of me in Spanish and they said yes and now they just make fun of me in English.
— 𝑴𝒐 𝑴𝒐𝒉𝒍𝒆𝒓 (@MoMohler) September 26, 2026
I’m glad cars were invented, imagine riding a horse at 6 AM to work.
— 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐢 (@maiiunreveled) September 22, 2026
The person who stole my shoes yesterday while i was on a bouncing castle at the mall please grow up
— Dahn.K (@EKabanda) September 27, 2026
that smell isn’t me. I still got 15 minutes left of my 96 hour deodorant
— Dr. Bооb (@freezingflesh) September 23, 2026
Put my phone on dnd for 5 hours and the only notiflication I got was a rejection mail for a job I applied to yesterday pic.twitter.com/nbW7KnZmGQ
— Yad Checxz (@YadChecxz) September 22, 2026
my mother doesnt understand that the reason so many trans people kill themselves after transitioning isn't because they hate their new bodies but because everyone hates them
— Bujo (@cestlavieeeee_7) September 27, 2026
Me during World War III fighting for China because I accepted all of Temu’s terms and conditions without reading them: pic.twitter.com/lY60l42eOD
— Ƙŵɓñ🦅 (@akokc_dark0) September 27, 2026
Barber asked me if i was working today and I said yeah mate you? didn’t speak for the rest of the cut pic.twitter.com/wI2gtkUD3g
— SS (@Sxkariya) September 24, 2026
Realised I left my security pass in my desktop when I got home which is a big no no. Went back to get it and bumped into my boss in the corridor and they said “you don’t have to stay so late Gary. You can come in later on Monday.” pic.twitter.com/NlIKHXuEvI
— 🏴Gary G. Oblin🇮🇪 (@MoroseHillGiant) September 25, 2026
Cave divers with 3 kids and a loving wife when they hear about a cave called Lucifer’s asshole pic.twitter.com/lMbTRvj5Jb
— Dad (@achiever4L) September 23, 2026
