me suspecting every character in a murder mystery book and then saying "I knew it" once the murderer is revealed.
— 📖🎧 (@inkandseerah) April 20, 2026
staring at the birds with my cat so he knows i care about his interests
— hunter (@3gpmh) April 18, 2026
"i can see your bra"
— miia (@miiagarro) April 21, 2026
good it was fucking expensive
“He doesn’t look autistic”
— 𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖗𝖑𝖞❤️🔥 (@Charlygotyou) April 18, 2026
My apologies, son perform autism for the lady please.
90’s dads were like “ yeah my six year old can handle terminator 2: judgment day “
— 🅱️ete oaks (@b0newalljackson) April 17, 2026
Did you know? Whenever a horse has an emergency with its eye, and needs to be kept in the dark to protect it — the easiest and most common solution is to have them wear a bra. pic.twitter.com/TJv0YjLht4
— Lunar & Sunny 🐴 (@lunarandsunny) April 21, 2026
forgive me karl marx for i have bought
— hunter (@3gpmh) April 20, 2026
My dad cheated on my mother with a lady with one leg shorter than the other one. My mother walked around the house limping, she said maybe that's what he wanted.
— Success.ofsnaps (@ThatSuccess_) April 21, 2026
If the Earth were flat, cats would have pushed everything over the edge already.
— Doc (@DocAtCDI) April 21, 2026
and if she would have had wheels she would have been a bike https://t.co/XRPv43LwoS
— putasinghonit (@putasinghonit) April 21, 2026
