“Fill name as appears in passport”
— Adedapo (@_aaadedapo) August 22, 2026
Me: opens my passport to confirm my name.
i hate when my stomach is growling like bro u have 20kg of fat to snack on
— bnuuy (@myuleeee) August 23, 2026
My “if we don’t get married before 30 we’ll marry ourselves” got married yesterday.
— WURA✨ Jewelry & Ankara in Abuja (@Cyborgofbuj) August 23, 2026
Chinese people will tell you they’re from a city you’ve never heard of and then you google it and it has 14 million people https://t.co/OGeXYvd7xr
— jake (@jakesgoodopines) August 21, 2026
manager said he will fire me and i threatened to delete all the data pic.twitter.com/6kHBiWAhiW
— V (@TheBrownUmbreon) August 23, 2026
a little life tip I just invented is to wash your hands properly in between cooking with chilli and removing contact lenses
— Mike Healy (@mike_hasarms) August 22, 2026
I could never be a pilot I’d abuse that fucking microphone and just force the people on board to listen to me. I’d make every flight a podcast episode
— larry davids mistress (@b1gdumb1diott) August 24, 2026
Pushed my Saturday chores to Sunday, and now Sunday has arrived. pic.twitter.com/EwPc1OxaSi
— 𝓝. 𖤐🧸 (@luvblessingz) August 24, 2026
Your lower back as soon as you turn 30 pic.twitter.com/JF0Pw8Nezu
— Kein Mensch Kein Tier (@KampfmitKette) August 21, 2026
sleeping for 12+ hours makes me realise how much i would enjoy being dead
— JΛCΞ (@jaceels2) August 22, 2026
