Me leaving my house at 8:07 am hoping I make it to work by 7:30am: pic.twitter.com/lI7HNt8F42
— DammyAyo💕 (@dartgurlie) January 16, 2026
Adding geologist to my resume after hitting rock bottom
— Fallon (@filthtofilth) January 19, 2026
Its been 4 years since my job interview. I'm beginning to suspect they chose someone else. 😂
— David (@latte147) January 15, 2026
Guy at work farted in the office so bad that we all cleared out and when we had a meeting about how people need to go outside to fart from here on, absolutely nobody laughed or even smiled. It was a fart so bad it made the entire concept of farts unfunny for all of us
— octopus/caveman (@octopuscaveman) January 20, 2026
It’s 3:30pm. Wife and I just ate dinner.
— Steve Olivas (@steveolivas) January 17, 2026
If we get any older, we’ll have to start eating our meals yesterday.
overheard my wife tell our cat to “go find something to do”
— oatmeal influencer (@acechhh) January 16, 2026
i'm gonna get one of these and get my boyfriend one of these so we can pretend i'm in prison when we facetime https://t.co/JacKTQj7wm
— roxy demento (@falseroxy) January 17, 2026
My husband texted me to tell me it's all over between us.
— єℓαιηє (@elainesim28) January 18, 2026
Imagine my relief when he sent me a further text, when he explained that he had sent that message to the wrong person!
Called my mom for advice and now we’re just arguing this is insane
— Hustlanani (@hustlanani) January 17, 2026
on my way to a meetup i initiated when i was in an extraverted mood pic.twitter.com/meMaIf2TOI
— Hadas Weiss (@weiss_hadas) January 15, 2026
