The more I hear murder victims on shows described as “popular, out-going, and loving life” the safer I feel

— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) January 15, 2023

I told my mom I thought parenting got easier as the kids get older and she laughed so hard she cried a little

— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) October 17, 2022

As an introvert I should be entitled to worker’s comp when forced to do team building activities

— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) August 20, 2022

I don’t know why parents look surprised when they see alcohol in my cart at the store. Your child is in my class, you know what I’m dealing with here

— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) February 15, 2022