My daughter wanted to go to the park and I really didn’t feel like it so she said “you could bring your new book and sit in the sun” and now we’re at the park
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) June 8, 2024
Someone asked my daughter if she had a hobby and her answer was “just sitting”
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) May 14, 2024
My daughter asked me if the tooth fairy would only give money for *her* teeth and I’m a little concerned
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) May 2, 2024
Sometimes when I fall asleep on my couch my cat will move the curtains and sun falls directly in my face waking me up and I can’t prove it but I know she does it on purpose
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) April 24, 2024
Me to me after one tiny mistake: you useless idiot
Me to my cat who committed 100 crimes in the past hour: my furry little angel, you are perfection my toe bean queen
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) March 16, 2024
When I say I’m tired, the “of people” is silent
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) February 7, 2024
Them: what could go wrong?
Me, who has overthought and imagined 56 different horrible scenarios: it’s my time to shine
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) January 13, 2024
I don’t believe in lying to children… unless it’s about where the good snacks are hidden. Then it’s fine.
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) January 18, 2024
I was making dinner and my daughter came running in and started playing her toy drums because she “knew I wouldn’t want it to be too quiet”
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) January 3, 2024
Everyone has that one friend that helps you get meaner
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) December 7, 2023