prepare for thanksgiving? i’ve been overeating and arguing with my family for years, i was born ready for this

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) November 25, 2024

“this new year will be better” i lie to myself for the ninth year in a row

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) December 31, 2024

The internet after learning about Luigi Mangione pic.twitter.com/cqEo0QZ50j

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) December 9, 2024

For $100 I will FaceTime you in scrubs on Thanksgiving and pretend to be your boyfriend that couldn’t make it because he had to work in the hospital

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) November 22, 2022

well well well, if it isn’t the couch i said i’d sit on for a few minutes that i fell asleep on for a few hours

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) August 25, 2024

dog owners: this is my dog

cat owners: this is my supervisor

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) August 9, 2024

how to have fun as an adult pic.twitter.com/kEGw8owHXb

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) July 6, 2024

how to have fun when it’s cold outside pic.twitter.com/pTQL2uXUuZ

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) January 21, 2024

sure sex is nice but have you ever cut wrapping paper when the scissors glide

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) December 24, 2023

me arranging the pizza rolls i’m about to microwave as a midnight snack pic.twitter.com/5p02fTuben

— Adam (@adamgreattweet) December 16, 2023